Yesterday was a great day and it was a tough day for me. Mother's day is always tough because it is the day that I mourn the loss of my baby. He went on to Heaven before he was ever born and I yearn for the day that I get to hold him there. His name is John Paul and he would be 17 this year. I am the mother of 5 children and my quiver is full. I know that he never suffered a moment of sorrow or despair. He was ushered in to the arms of his Creator and all his tears were wiped away. My heart aches for other women who never knew the feel of their babies in their arms. They never got to stay up all night and worry about the amount of food the baby is getting. They never got to change a messy diaper or listen to a colicky child scream for no reason. They never designed a nursery or picked out little booties. We never got to hear our children's first words or see their first steps. We were not able to hold our children on this earth but with God's redeeming, restoring Hands, we will be able to hold them in Heaven. Our tears will, also, be wiped away. Our broken hearts will be soothed.
On a different note, my son, Summie, turned 3 yesterday. He brings me so much joy. I love his zest for life and his boyness. After having 2 daughters first, watching him act like a boy is great. He climbs and runs and just acts plain silly. He loves people and smiles readily. Almost everyone loves him. He has bright blue eyes that match his bright disposition. He is sweet and very concerned with other's feelings. He has a vivid imagination that is displayed in sayings like, "The moo-moo bit me" or "the ee-ee-ah-ah(monkey) is in the tree eating a banana." These sayings never fail to make me smile! I look forward to his 4th year of life and his sweet kisses and warm snuggles!
I, also, spent the evening with my mom. There has been some speculation that I have 2 moms. Well, that is just not true. I have 3 plus several mentors whom I love dearly. My first mom is the one who gave birth to me. Whether or not she intended to she formed in me some things that followed me through life. I don't call her mom! My mommy is my maternal grandmother. She adopted me and took care of me. She was the mother that God hand picked for me from before the beginning of time. She instilled in me values and love. The lessons that she taught me impacted me in a far greater way than anyone else. She was selfless in the raising of kids who weren't hers. The unwanted, the discarded! I am blessed to call her mom! The 3rd is my mom-in-law. We have a great relationship, the 2 of us. She raised a great son and has taught me so many things in 11 short years. She knows me and still loves me, warts and all. I want to be a mother-in-law like her. God knew that I have abandonment issues and brought her into my life to assuage those somewhat. What a privilege to call her mom!
May we not just honor our moms on this one day but like the commandment states. Honor your mother! This should be everyday!
